This is a very personal blog. When I was a kid my mom had married a man that was abusive and as a result we had to "run away" many times. Often times it would be a quick, pack up your stuff and let's go in the middle of the night. She often went back because I think she felt the abuse was better than having her children out with no place to officially lived. One of these times we went from one of her friend's houses to another. We stayed in our car, in basements, etc. It was frightening and being homeless doesn't always mean literally on the streets, but we were indeed homeless. When she left the final time it took months for us to get into a place of our own. Luckily there were only the three of us.
I recently lost my job and it's been four weeks of no income on my part. I was the bread winner of the family and with the snag in my unemployment it's been beyond rough. Especially now, because I wonder if we will have a roof over our heads, if I will need to put my children through the same thing I had to endure as a child. Although there isn't an issue of abuse here there is a very real possibility of being without a home. I love this apartment, I love our neighborhood, the kids love their school, and now everything hangs in the balance. I am trying so hard to hold on to the hope that God has heard me and that he is trying to help. My husband and I applied recently for Target and we both got a job, but because of the hold up with background checks and drug tests we don't have orientation until Friday. That means that it could take weeks for a check as they pay bi-weekly and I couldn't even begin to predict how much it will actually be.
I feel that personally this is the farthest I've ever fallen in life. To feel like you have no options, no place to turn, and you hold the whole future of your family in some delicate balance unknowing which way it will swing is a terrifying feeling. I've called and called about rental assistance to only hear the same message over and over, "We are currently out of funds for rental assistance." I know a lot of Americans are struggling greatly, but I honestly never thought that I would be one of them to experience this depth of struggle. Through the grace of God and friends, and angels we have made it this far. However, this is the one final battle, the most important one to get through this time and I'm running out of options fast.
